In our last post we talked about the three types of men. Now let’s talk about women. Women are quite different than men, obviously. Sometimes the term “Alpha woman” is thrown around, but it’s not quite accurate. Instead, a woman is either a Dominant, Submissive, or an Independent. These have similar parallels to the three male types, but not exactly, as you’ll see.
Just as interesting as the three types of women is what modern society says about these three types. According to modern society, it’s bad for women to be submissive, it’s great for women to be dominant, and dominant women think they’re independent, when in fact the reverse is true.
I’ll explain all of this as we go along, but it never ceases to amaze me how thoroughly society brainwashes women so as to be the least happy as possible.
Okay, here are the three types:
Dominant Women – Dominant women are the loose female equivalent of the Needy Alpha. These gals are strong and bossy. They also tend to be bitchy, but not always. As soon as she gets into a relationship with a man (sometimes even before then, like on the first date!) she starts issuing orders, standards, rules, and parameters, and she expects the guy to follow these to the letter. Sometimes she issues them nicely and sweetly with a smile on her face, sometimes she issues them in a very angry, bitchy, or self-righteous manner.
It really depends on the woman, but the point is she issues orders/expectations, expects them to be followed, and gets pissed if they aren’t. If the guy in her life doesn’t follow her I’m-a-woman-I-deserve-respect program, she’ll go into drama-mode fast. He “doesn’t love her” or “doesn’t understand how hard I work” or “doesn’t respect our relationship” or “is playing games” or “is a pig”. Dominants are almost always high-drama gals.
The problem is, many Dominants are very smart, very attractive, and very fun to be with. Men often fall for fun, feminine Dominants only to soon get a bucket full of drama and rules thrown at them. (I call these “Stealth Dominants”; they’re great for the first few weeks, but then…watch out.)
About 60% – 65% of the women out there in the modern-day western world are Dominants. It’s become a cultural norm. As I implied above, some of these women are extreme Dominants, some are lesser Dominants, but they’re all Dominants.
As I’ve talked about before, usually a woman’s age indicates the intensity of her dominant tendencies. Generally speaking, and yes there are always unusual exceptions, a Dominant 23 year-old is going to be less domineering than a Dominant 43 year-old, but they’re still both Dominants.
Submissive Women – Submissives are the very loose female equivalent of a beta…but not really. Submissives prefer a man to take charge. They are most comfortable with a strong man who is the boss at least most of the time. Submissives are not (necessarily) weak women. Some Submissives are very strong, for example they can be bosses or managers at work. But at their core, they like it when a man is at least the 60% boss.
Submissives are still women, so they can be extremely high-drama at times, and they will still have some expectations they expect men to adhere to. The difference is they’re much more flexible about them in the presence of a strong man, whereas a Dominant is inflexible regardless of how strong her man is.
Submissives tend to be the most feminine women of the three types, by far.
Key point: Submissives are not like beta males. Unlike betas, Submissives can become the dominant one in the relationship if she ends up with a submissive beta male. I’ve seen this many times. A Submissive moves in with a beta, and the Submissive slowly assumes the power in the relationship. However, by doing this she is miserable inside. She eventually throws massive drama at him and cheats on him. When the relationship finally ends (which it will), hopefully she ends up with a strong man so she can be herself again.
Another key difference between Submissives and betas is that Submissives truly like being submissive, while most betas (particularly the “whiny beta” I described in the last post) are submissive to their partners while simultaneously hating it.
Submissives never hate it when they’re submissive to their male partners. They prefer it that way. (Two exceptions to this: 1. The occasional disagreements that arise in any relationship, 2. Overly brutal, domineering, and/or disrespectful behavior on the part of the man. )
About 25% – 30% of women out there are Submissives. Again, it’s a scale, i.e. some Submissives are submissive, other Submissives are very submissive.
Independent Women – There is a huge, and I mean HUGE misnomer in society about “independent women”. But I’ll get to that in a minute. The remaining 10% or so of women out there are Independents. As you might have guessed, Independents are the loose equivalent of an Alpha.
Independent women are the rare women in society who are largely outcome independent even if they’re in a very serious relationship. They’re very strong women like Dominants, but, completely unlike Dominants they are so excited with their own lives, their own career or friends or school or passions or hobbies or whatever, they don’t have any need to boss a guy around. They are usually low-drama because frankly, they don’t have time for it. They’re too busy enjoying their lives.
Independents can often be a handful for men. They tend to be very busy, all over the place, non-stop, go-go-go gals. They often have high sex drives too, which is great for Alphas, but bad for betas (when she wants to have sex and he’s “too tired”) and bad for Needy Alphas (when she wants to flirt or get sexual with other men).
Independents are not perfect; they can and do get dramatic at times just like all women. It’s also hard for independents to stay with one man for very long, or at least stay monogamous. Having children also tends to slow them down, and perhaps they even secretly resent being mothers just a little bit. Independents also tend to be a little more masculine, which can turn a lot of men off.
Now here’s the BIG MYTH in society about “strong, independent women”. Ready? It’s this:
Dominants mistakenly think they’re Independents.
Dominant women are not independent. It’s actually the exact opposite. Dominants are actually very dependent. Dominant women are dependent upon always bossing someone around. If a Dominant doesn’t have a man in her life to boss around, she starts getting very uncomfortable. She will quickly make some major changes and go grab some guy she can boss around so she can “relax” again by being a boss. They mistake bossiness for independence. I’ll say it again. Dominant women are not independent. They’re dominant, but not independent. It’s not the same thing. Same goes for Needy Alpha men. Dominant, yes, but very dependent.
So when you hear a woman brag about how she’s a “strong independent woman”, she’s just announced to you she’s a Dominant, not an Independent. So you need to be careful. Unless you’re a beta male who likes to be told what to do, a long-term relationship with this gal is going to be damn near impossible. Fuck buddy is okay…Dominants make fantastic FBs if you know how to stand up to their bullshit while still making it clear you accept them for what they are. Some of the hottest sex I’ve ever had has been with my Dominant FBs…but if I were to actually get into a romantic serious relationship with one of these women I’m pretty sure I’d kill myself.
The point is, don’t expect a happy, romantic relationship with a Dominant if you’re a more Alpha guy, unless you like drama. (Which I know some of you bastards do!)
Obviously as you read above you’ll see links between the man types and the woman types. Betas tend to end up with Dominants. Needy Alphas tend to end up with Submissives. Alphas happily have relationships with all three types of women (Independents and Submissives as OLTRs, MLTRs, or WDs, Dominants as FBs). If a beta ends up with a Submissive, the Submissive will take control and then start growing resentment. Independents love betas and Alphas (though they dislike Needy Alphas, see below) and will often alternate between the two.
You can also see the bad combinations. Nuclear explosions occur when Needy Alphas hook up with Dominants. This does happen and it’s funny to watch all the predictable meltdowns and explosions. Both of them get involved in a relationship fully planning on “changing” the other. Ha ha! Stupid! Independents will get a little more submissive in the face of a Needy Alpha for a while, but then the Needy Alpha wakes up one morning to see his Independent girlfriend has left him, and with no explanation, and he can’t get her back no matter what he tries.
Alphas and Dominants avoid each other like the plague (other than the clever Alpha FB loophole described above). They can “detect” each other within the first 10 minutes of the first date, then they both run away fast. As an Alpha I’ve had many first dates like this. The attitude with both parties is “Very cool person, but I could never date this guy/gal.”
This is a very big topic and I could go on, but you get the point. I hope between both of these posts I’ve cleared a few things up.