I had sex with a new gal about a week ago. That’s not news; I get laid a lot. However, how it happened is very interesting and teaches a lot about how women work this whole dating thing.
If you’re a regular reader, you know that a few months back I did a huge online dating blitz where I sent out a bunch of openers, got a bunch of first dates, and laid a few new women. I posted about the results and my experiences.
I mentioned back then that sometimes it will takes weeks or even months for some women to come around to meet you because of crap they’re going through in their lives. These women are often still layable, and you’re about to see exactly how this works.
One girl from that big online blitz a few months back was a cute gal in her early 20’s. I can’t give a lot of detail about her other than to say that she’s hot, about an 8 on my scale. During our email and text conversations, she was very excited to meet me. She ended up cancelling on our first date anyway. So far, very normal. Approximately 40% of all my first dates are either cancelled or rescheduled by the woman, since women are terrible at keeping sechedules in their personal lives and men they have not had sex with yet are extremely low on their list of priorities.
So no problem. We just rescheduled. She was excited. A few days later, she canceled again.
Over the next several weeks, when I would occasionally text her, we would fluff talk briefly, and I’d pitch a meetup again. Her answer was always something very non-specific, like “That would be fun!” or “Maybe next week” or “I might be able to do that”, but she never actually got around to committing to date/time/place.
So I put her on the slow track list on my spreadsheet, making sure to text her about once every 10 to 20 days or so, and added her as a friend on Facebook. She would always keep the contact going, was always positive and interested, but was always “too busy” to meet up.
For a few weeks it went like this. I was already getting laid often (as always) so I really didn’t care. I never bothers me when a woman does this, because I’m always working on (and getting sex from) multiple women. Soon, she changes her Facebook status to “In A Relationship”. Like I was surprised.
I simply nodded and moved her name from the slow track list to the “do not contact” list. There is no point in contacting a woman who is currently experiencing NRE with a new man in her life. She’s in relationship-Disneyland at the moment and is not interested in hearing from you. Instead, just make a note, fuck other chicks, and patiently wait.
A few months went by. Then one day, right on schedule, she changes her status back to “Single” and puts all kinds of whiny dramatic breakup crap on her Facebook page, the kind we always see all the time there.
A quick aside about Facebook. I’ve come to realize that 90% of Facebook is made up of four things:
1. People talking about how in love they are with their BF or GF and how great everything is.
2. People (usually females) whining and bitching about a breakup they’re going through.
3. AFCs commenting on girl’s pics telling them how hot they are.
4. Married women commenting on other married women’s pics about how cute their kids are.
I’m serious. That’s what Facebook has become. Facebook has become so predictable and repetitive I begin to tire of it. Google+ can’t get here fast enough.
Anyway, as I read the same breakup stuff I’ve seen women post a million times, I get a big evil smile on my face and put an reminder in my phone to go off in 48 hours. 48 hours later it goes off and boom, I text her.
She’s ecstatic to hear from me. She tells me about how she moved in with a guy after only knowing him for one month (typical) and how massive drama ensued (typical) and how now he’s outta there (typical).
Now here’s the important part. She was suddenly dying to meet me. She couldn’t that evening because of family stuff but the following evening she was getting off work at midnight and wanted to meet up then, right after work. When I mentioned that was a little late, she begged and pleaded to meet up with me. It was amazing. She even said that if that night couldn’t work to “please give me another chance!”. I reluctantly agreed, expecting her to cancel like she had so many times before.
Well, wouldn’tcha know it? Right at midnight, she was there at the 24 hour restaurant, waiting for me. She even showed up early. Within an hour I was kinoing her and caressing her beautiful face. No kiss though. I don’t do that on a first quick meet (especially when it’s past midnight and I’m half asleep already). She didn’t want anything to eat. I just drank water. Grand total cost of the first date: three bucks (a tip I left for the waiter out of politeness because we were taking up the table).
We met up again a few days later and were having sex within about 45 minutes…without me spending any more money.
Quite a change from her earlier blow-off behavior, isn’t it?
So weeks and weeks of dorking around with scheduling a date vs. immediately meeting me and fucking me in less than three days and in less than three hours total meet-to-lay. A few lessons to learn from this:
1. If a woman wants to meet up with you, she will. She will make the time. If she’s being very nice to you but constantly giving you excuses why she can’t schedule a meet, she doesn’t want to meet up with you. At least, not at this time in her life. Stop wasting your time with her. Place her on the slow track (or forget her completely) and focus on other women.
2. If a woman is being nice but blowing you off, this almost always means there is another guy in the picture. This very, very common, especially in online game, where those chicks on the dating sites may not be quite as “single” as they present themselves to be. It could be a full-on boyfriend, or an ex-boyfriend, or a fuck buddy, or a new guy she just started dating, or something completely different, but trust me, there’s guy in there somewhere. She will NOT tell you this.
Because of ASD and societal programming, the fact she’s even talking to you is “bad” in her mind. So she’s just going to keep being nice and stringing you along, keeping your attention for as long as possible (since attention is what women crave most in life). Again, move on.
3. Years ago when I was a young AFC, a hot blonde chick I used to work with told me a joke while she was bitching about her boyfriend. She said, “What do women and computers have in common? They always have backups.” I don’t care how much your girlfriend/lover says she loves you…if she’s not already cheating on you then at least there is another guy she’s got in the “backup” box that she’s hiding right around the corner whom she’s going to fuck as soon as you piss her off. (Whether or not she breaks up with you first depends on the woman and the circumstances.)
This is normal and you need to accept the fact this is how women work. And let’s be honest…if you have a girlfriend (or similar) you’re probably doing the same damn thing.
If you have a mono-GF, this is of course is bad. But if you’re a poly guy like me, this is fantastic. One of the many reasons I get laid as much as I do is that I am that number-two “backup” guy to a lot of women who currently have temporary boyfriends (or husbands!). Something to think about.
4. If a woman you’re working on suddenly gets into a relationship with a guy, don’t worry about it. Remember, monogamy doesn’t work. People just want it to work. It won’t last very long, especially if she’s under age 35 or so. Just make a note of her, ignore her for a few months, and re-acquire her later after she breaks up. I have done this many times with many women of all ages and it works extremely well.
5. If a woman you’re working on suddenly gets into a relationship with a guy, stop contacting her completely . She’s in NRE now. To her, he’s new and therefore exciting and full of promise. She thinks she’s finally found the The One™, the Love Of Her Life™, and the Man Of Her Dreams™. Women LSNFTE me all the time because they get excited about some New Guy. He is consuming 100% of her energies and fantasies at this point, so contacting her during this phase is a massive waste of your time. Just wait, and let her have her temporary NRE.
In a few months she’ll discover he’s either a boring needy jealous AFC or a cheating Alpha. If he’s an AFC, she’ll dump his ass. If he’s a cheating Alpha, he’ll hurt and infuriate her. Either way, that’s when you make your move and get results. Until then, consider her off-limits for a while and keep working on and/or fucking other women.
This new gal is little too high-drama and low-intelligence for an MLTR, but she’ll make a fantastic FB. Which is perfect since I just had to recently next one of my other FBs. Yea, the Lord doth provideth abundance!